Choose Gratitude

Sometimes the holidays can be a difficult time for people. It can feel like something to “get through” rather than something to enjoy. At times there are triggers that can keep us from loving and appreciating the holidays as much as we could. It’s in times like these that we have to make a choice to be grateful and find joy. We need to choose gratitude. I recently heard that gratitude and negative thoughts cannot function simultaneously.

I’ve written previously, that gratitude can affect our hearts and our perspectives. I’ve learned that obsessing and focusing on the negative will make me bitter. It can also cause a spiritual blockage which can in turn be offensive to others and to God.

However, when I can shift my mind from the negative things and intentionally focus on and choose gratitude, a positive internal shift happens. Looking back with gratitude and thankfulness can lighten the load and help things seem a little brighter and less dark. Additionally, choosing to see God’s provision can alleviate some frustration and discontent.

Gratitude affects our mental health & well-being

It should come as no surprise that gratitude is a crucial component of mental health and well-being.

Numerous studies have concluded that gratitude showed significant protection against and lowered levels of depression and anxiety.^[1][2][3] One 2015 study indicated that “Gratitude is a protective factor against psychopathology not only due to its association with improved relationships with others, but also because it is connected to a less critical, less punishing, and more compassionate relationship with the self.”^[4]

If we find ourselves dealing with difficult and negative thoughts and emotions, it’s a great time to shift our focus. It’s time to choose gratitude.

Gratitude and negative thoughts can’t coexist

I heard someone say that our brains can’t respond to negative feelings and gratitude and the same time–that it’s an either/or situation. Sometimes we cannot always control the negative feelings that come. However, we CAN choose our responses and choose what we continue to think about.

There is a great article, The Neuroscience of Gratitude and Effects on the Brain, citing many scientific and psychological studies, that shows many of the multifaceted benefits of gratitude. In it, the author states that, “…our mind cannot focus on positive and negative information at the same time. By consciously practicing gratitude, we can train the brain to attend selectively to positive emotions and thoughts, thus reducing anxiety and feelings of apprehension.”^[5] Additionally, it also mentions that “Expressions of gratitude help in building and sustaining long-term relationships, deal with adversities and bounce back from them with strength and motivation.”^[6]

Choose Gratitude

We need to learn to disrupt thoughts of depression, anxiety, worries, fears, insecurity, rejection, and obsessions, and replace those with thoughts and acts of gratitude. The Bible tells us that we have to wage war in our minds. We have to take negative thoughts captive and replace them with godly thoughts that will bring us peace. Intentional thoughts and acts of gratitude, both to God and others, are a perfect way to do this.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” Philippians 4:6-9 (ESV)

“For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. “ 2 Corinthian 10:3-5 (NIV)

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (ESV)

Take Some Practical Steps to Choose Gratitude:

• First, you need to make a choice and be intentional.

When negative thoughts and emotions start to surface, intentionally decide right then and there not to continue to focus, obsess, and stew on those. Instead, choose gratitude. Choose to focus on godly things and things for which you are thankful.

• Then, find some ways to choose gratitude and act on it.

Here are some previous posts with a variety of ways to practice gratitude and thankfulness:

Looking Back With Gratitude: Includes some ways to look back and find things to be grateful for.

Gratitude Prompts: Discusses how gratitude can actually make us happier and healthier, physically and mentally, and includes a list of things to prompt gratitude and thankfulness.

Be Thankful—Remember What God Has Done : Includes some ways to reflect on and be thankful for things that God has done for you.

6 Simple Ways to Stay Thankful Year-Round: Contains ideas for expressing and recording your gratitude.

What Are You Thankful For?: Includes some ideas to think beyond the usual things you might be thankful for.

• Finally, spend some time in prayer, and ask God to show you some areas where you might need to shift your focus and your thoughts to gratitude. Then be open and receptive to hear and obey what he says.

Where are some areas in your life where you need to choose gratitude? What are some ways that you are going to do that? Tell us about it by leaving a comment below.

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If you know anyone who could benefit from this, please pay it forward!  Share this post via the sharing links below.  “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV) 

1. Laird, Steven P., et al. “Research: ‘Measuring Private Prayer: Development, Validation, and Clinical Application of the Multidimensional Prayer Inventory.’” International Journal for the Psychology of Religion, vol. 14, no. 4, 2004, pp. 251–272, https://doi.org/10.1207/s15327582ijpr1404_2. ↑
2. Sun, Peizhen, et al. “Gratitude as a protective factor against anxiety and depression among Chinese adolescents: The mediating role of coping flexibility.” Asian Journal of Social Psychology, vol. 23, no. 4, 2020, pp. 447–456, https://doi.org/10.1111/ajsp.12419. ↑
3. Wood, Alex M., et al. “The Role of Gratitude in the Development of Social Support, Stress, and Depression: Two longitudinal studies.” Journal of Research in Personality, vol. 42, no. 4, 2008, pp. 854–871, https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jrp.2007.11.003. ↑
4. Petrocchi, Nicola, and Alessandro Couyoumdjian. “The Impact of Gratitude on Depression and Anxiety: The mediating role of criticizing, attacking, and reassuring the self.” Self and Identity, vol. 15, no. 2, 2015, pp. 191–205, https://doi.org/10.1080/15298868.2015.1095794. ↑
5. Chowdhury, Madhuleena Roy. “The Neuroscience of Gratitude and Effects on the Brain.” Reviewed by William Smith, PositivePsychology.Com, 3 Oct. 2023, positivepsychology.com/neuroscience-of-gratitude/. ↑
6. Chowdhury, Madhuleena Roy. “The Neuroscience of Gratitude and Effects on the Brain.” Reviewed by William Smith, PositivePsychology.Com, 3 Oct. 2023, positivepsychology.com/neuroscience-of-gratitude/. ↑