How to Pray: Speaking From the Heart
I think so many times people shy away from praying or hesitate to pray because they simply don’t know how to pray. Previously we discussed the whys and whens and wheres of praying. I’d like to spend a little time now on the hows. We’ll look at some of the best ways to speak to and approach God. Discussing in a few different posts, I’ll share some ways of “how to pray”. In this post, I’ll focus on how to pray by speaking from the heart.
Afraid of not doing it “right”
I know from personal experience that praying can seem intimidating (especially if you have to pray out loud). I’ve always been a rule-follower, and sometimes I’ve been reluctant to pray for fear of not doing it right. I was afraid that God wouldn’t hear me or answer me if I didn’t know how to pray correctly or follow the right pattern or recipe for prayer. I’ve heard so MANY formulas over the years! Which one is the right one? Which one do I use for which occasion? What if I get it wrong? What if I leave a step out?
Well, I’ve learned that there are really many effective ways you can pray. However, all in all, the most important thing I’ve learned is that God is understanding and meets you where you are. Contrary to popular thinking, He’s NOT a legalistic God who says, “Oh…you didn’t give praise and thanks first before making a request of me. Too bad, so sad. Guess you’re not going to get your prayer answered this time.” God cares more about speaking from the heart than He cares about the specific words or the way that we pray. He wants us to pour our hearts out to Him and be just honest. He wants us to just be ourselves with Him. God already knows what we think and feel anyway.
“The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working].” James 5:16 (AMP)
Want powerful and effective prayers? Don’t be fake.
It’s the earnest and heartfelt prayers that are the powerful and effective ones. For me, it’s such a turn-off when I hear prayers that sound so fake and ingenuine. Prayers like…
“Oh thou Holy Father and Creator of all things good. I modestly draw near to Your most hallowed throne in humbleness of spirit as I approach Your magnificent, pure, holy, and upright presence in which I’m not worthy of standing. Oh, Omniscient One of grace, I bow before Your gloriousness now to meekly request that You sanctify my wretched deeds on this most sacred day and bless this most bountiful harvest of food that layeth before us…blah, blah, blah…”
Give me a break. Nobody really talks like that. I’m sorry if I’m coming across as blasphemous. I promise that is not my intention at all. I just really feel like God has freed me from having to sound all spiritual and elaborate when I pray. God has shown me that it’s perfectly okay to just come to Him as I am. I don’t have to try to be or talk like somebody I’m not. I have learned to talk to God just like I would talk to a friend, family member, or parent. It’s not necessary to use eloquent words. I don’t need to pray to seem “spiritual”. I just need to be real, to be me.
“When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites! They love to stand up and pray in the houses of worship and on the street corners, so that everyone will see them. I assure you, they have already been paid in full. But when you pray, go to your room, close the door, and pray to your Father, who is unseen. And your Father, who sees what you do in private, will reward you. When you pray, do not use a lot of meaningless words, as the pagans do, who think that their gods will hear them because their prayers are long. Do not be like them. Your Father already knows what you need before you ask him.” Matthew 6:5-7 (GNT)
A not-so-fancy example
So if I’m praying for a meal for example, instead of the lofty prayer above, it’s perfectly acceptable for me to say…
“Lord, Thank you for this day, and thank you for the food we’re about to eat (my kids used add here… ’and thank you for the food we’ve already eaten’ because they’d usually already snuck in a few bites). Please bless it and help it to keep us healthy. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Nothing fancy or extravagant is necessary. Sometimes we’ll add some more things we’re thankful for and/or some additional requests for the rest of the day. Other than that, it’s typically pretty short and sweet and void of any flowery King James language.
Silent or out loud prayers?
Should we pray aloud or silently? Either or both. As long as you’re speaking from the heart and not just putting your prayer on display, God hears you either way. Most of my prayer time is typically private and silent. God still hears me, and He still answers me even if I’m just praying in my head.
Praying out loud can take some getting used to because we are usually self-conscious. The more you pray aloud though, the more comfortable you will become. I remember slightly freaking out when I first had to start praying out loud in front of others, especially if I didn’t know them well. Now, I can easily pray at the start of a meeting, in a Bible study, or at my Moms in Prayer group, and it doesn’t scare me at all. I just pray from the heart and speak as I normally would. I also like to occasionally pray out loud with my kids to give them an example to follow, to show them it’s okay to talk to God like we talk to anyone else and to let them know it’s not as hard as you might think to pray out loud.
An ongoing conversation
Prayer is just talking to an invisible friend walking along beside you throughout the day.
Also, as I stated in a previous post, my prayers tend to be an ongoing conversation throughout the day anyway (both silent and aloud) so it’s a lot easier to just speak conversationally with God. It truly is as if I have an invisible friend walking along beside me throughout the day. It makes it easier to talk to Him when I think of Him that way. After all, the Bible does say we are friends of God!
“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15 (NIV)
Take Some Practical Steps to Learn How to Pray by Speaking From the Heart:
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First, understand that God meets you where you are, and He won’t ignore you if you mess up.
Remind yourself, especially if you’re reluctant to pray, that God is not a domineering dictator but a loving father that wants to hear from you…no matter what.
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Secondly, you don’t have to pray eloquent, fancy, flowery, or King James Version prayers—Don’t pray to be seen by others or use vain repetitions.
You don’t have to be super-spiritual to pray. Your prayers don’t need to be eloquent or extravagant. They don’t even have to be long. Don’t be fake. Just be real. Just be you.
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Next, talk to God just like you’re talking to a good friend (because He IS your friend).
Speak to Him from your heart. Don’t be intimidated by Him (or by others who may hear you pray). Just have a friendly conversation. 🙂
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Then, pray silently OR out loud.
Either way, God wants to hear from you. Either way, God will still answer you.
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Finally, don’t be afraid to be an example to others (not a showy display) of how to pray and be real/normal with God.
For example…with your kids, grandkids, employees, or any “baby” or new-to-faith Christians in your influence. You never know when you are teaching somebody to pray without even realizing it!
We also discuss more in subsequent posts (click here or here to read more on how to pray).
How did you learn how to pray? How do you talk to God? Tell us about it by leaving a comment below.
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*Updated: Originally posted 7/21/2015
So Very enlightening. Talk to God as if you’re talking to your loved ones, softly and confidently.