Let Your Life Speak Louder Than Your Words
This past week during our church youth group, a few of the student small groups got together for a Question & Answer session. During this Q&A session the topic of letting your life speak came up. A couple of the questions that arose had to do with how we, as Christians, should behave around unbelievers (non-Christians) or those with differing lifestyles. Some examples of the questions included:
How do I talk to this person who is an atheist?
How am I supposed to talk to people about God if they don’t believe the same way I do or have a different religion?
How should I treat homosexuals or transgender people (if I disagree with their lifestyle)?
A couple of the students and leaders threw some obvious answers out there…
“You treat them/talk to them the exact same way you’d treat anyone else!”
“Treat others in the same way that you would want them to treat you.” Luke 6:31 (NET)
“Jesus, himself, was found hanging out with the ‘sinners’. Jesus said ‘Healthy people don’t need a doctor–sick people do.’ (Luke 5:31 NLT) How are we supposed to impact or influence people that don’t believe if we don’t spend time with them and show them love? That’s what Jesus did.”
Let your life speak…aka Let your life do the talking
I tried to share some examples from my own life about how this might be played out practically. I shared how I felt that our lives are actually more impactful and powerful than our words. In fact, I might do better winning people over by keeping my mouth shut! In other words, we need to let our life speak louder than our words.
The following scripture has always been a significant one for me in this area…
“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” 1 Peter 3:1-4 (NIV) or said another way…
“…Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words…” 1 Peter 3:1 (NLT)
I’ve mentioned before how I’m a fan of daily positive affirmations. One of my affirmations is “People see Jesus in me. I win people over by the way I live without saying a word.” My heart’s desire and prayer is that I am always a positive reflection and representation of Jesus because I know that I might be the only “Jesus” that some people see.
“And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” Colossians 3:17 (NLT)
Even Jesus told people to let their life speak
“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5:16 (NIV)
“”Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” Matthew 7:12 (NLT)
“A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Matthew 22:39 (NLT)
Other scriptures about letting your life speak, especially to unbelievers
“Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.” Colossians 4:5-6 (NLT)
“So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise.” Ephesians 5:15 (NLT)
“Finally, dear brothers and sisters, we urge you in the name of the Lord Jesus to live in a way that pleases God, as we have taught you. You live this way already, and we encourage you to do so even more. For you remember what we taught you by the authority of the Lord Jesus…Then people who are not Christians will respect the way you live, and you will not need to depend on others.” 1 Thessalonians 4:1-2, 12 (NLT) or said another way…
“So that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” 1 Thessalonians 4:12 (NIV)
“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” 1 Peter 3:1-4 (NIV) or said another way…
“…Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words…” 1 Peter 3:1 (NLT)
A few personal examples of how this has played out for me
Years ago some of the biggest compliments I have ever received came in the form of a comments written in a couple of my college students’ final portfolios:
“One of the things that I learned from this course that wasn’t in the book and that was simply from the instructor was that you truly can have it all through faith and trusting in the Lord. I know you didn’t teach on this, but I learned just by being around you and seeing how happy of a person you are and the stories you tell about your family and all.”
“I learned from Tracy how to be a Christian in a secular environment. I have always lived in what I call my “Christian bubble” so moving into college life wasn’t like that anymore. Watching Tracy handle all different backgrounds and people with grace and fairness really helped me to see how I should treat others going forward.”
In this post about making a difference without even realizing it, I shared about how I had apparently impacted multiple students during what I thought was one of the worst semesters ever and how I also ran into a friend from over 20 years ago that I had apparently impacted without realizing it.
Additionally, in youth I shared a story about a friend of mine who had actually asked to come to church with me (kind of backwards, huh?!) because over the years she had noticed a difference about me and knew that I was a Christian. She has since become a Christian, in addition to both of her kids (who now go to youth with me).
These are ALL answers to my prayer of “God, let people see Jesus in me. Help me to win people over without saying a word.”
Some great articles on the topic
I just read an excellent article this week on this exact same topic: “Your Life is Your Pulpit!” by Rick Renner. In this article, Pastor Rick says,
“Everywhere you go, you are a sermon that someone is watching…It is unfortunate — but true — that often Christians unintentionally do or say things that leave unbelievers with a sour taste in their mouths. These believers forget that their life is their pulpit and the strongest message they will ever preach. It is a fact that many believers have lost their Christian influence because of things they do or say that reflect a wrong image of Jesus Christ.”[1]
Another great article that I stumbled upon is this one about proper conduct toward unbelievers.
Take Some Practical Steps to Let Your Life Speak Louder Than Your Words:
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First, aim to let your life speak Christ’s message. SAY and PRAY: Let people see Jesus in me so that I can win people over without saying a word.
You are like a billboard for Jesus! Send a message and advertise Jesus with your life.
“…Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words…” 1 Peter 3:1 (NLT)
“So that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” 1 Thessalonians 4:12 (NIV)
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Secondly, remember that you have to win people to yourself before you can ever win them to the Lord.
Keep in mind that in order to really be able to speak into someone’s life, it’s more effective if there is relationship and rapport there. When reaching the lost, you need to develop a rapport, trust, and relationship with those who are in need of help. Be genuine about it (people can see through false intentions). Invest in them. If they don’t feel they can trust you, they won’t listen to you and won’t let you help them. (Read more in this post about What I Learned From a Bunny About Reaching the Lost)
“You were cleansed from your sins when you obeyed the truth, so now you must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply with all your heart.” 1 Peter 1:22(NLT)
“Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.” Romans 12:9 (NLT)
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Then know that kindness leads to repentance.
It’s not the mean, angry, horrible wrath of God that will draw people to him. God is love. He is a loving God, and the Bible says that it’s God’s kindness that leads us to repentance. God showed mercy toward us. What more should we, who received this undeserved mercy, show mercy, kindness and love toward others. Even Paul, self-professed to be the “worst of sinners”, said that he was won over with God’s mercy. In turn he could now be an example to others of God’s patience to those who don’t believe. It is kindness and love that will lead people to God, not wrath, condemnation, shame, or judgement.
“Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?” Romans 2:4 (NIV)
“This is a trustworthy saying, and everyone should accept it: “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners”—and I am the worst of them all. But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life.” 1 Timothy 1:15-16 (NLT)
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Romans 12:21 (NIV)
“The LORD passed in front of Moses, calling out, “Yahweh! The LORD! The God of compassion and mercy! I am slow to anger and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness.” Exodus 34:6 (NLT)
“In order that in the coming ages He might display the surpassing riches of His grace, demonstrated by His kindness to us in Christ Jesus.” Ephesians 2:7 (BSB)
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Try to always let your life speak for you, but if you MUST say anything be gentle, respectful, and kind.
“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” 1 Peter 3:15 (NIV)
“Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth.” 2 Timothy 2:25 (NLT)
“To speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.” Titus 3:2 (ESV)
“Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.” Galatians 6:1 (NLT) NOTE: This is speaking about believers, NOT about correcting unbelievers.
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Remember to practice TRUE tolerance—Be compassionate without compromising your convictions. Walk hand-in-hand without having to see eye-to-eye.
Do not compromise your convictions, but as much as possible, try to live at peace with everyone. As Christians we need to be very cautious that in standing for what we believe, we don’t become so “religious” that we alienate those we could potentially influence. God will place people in our lives with whom we can establish relationship. How we behave will make an impression. If we show a bad representation of Jesus, who would want to be a part of that?
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Romans 12:18 (NIV)
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Finally, be patient when letting your life speak! Remember that you are not God and that it is not all up to you.
Who says you have to win somebody to God in one single setting? Who says that YOU are even going to be the person to lead them to Jesus? What if you are just planting seeds? What if you are just coming along to water some seeds that somebody else planted? Maybe you are just playing a small role in the part of leading that person to the Lord (i.e. supporting actor vs. leading role ).
“I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow. It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow. The one who plants and the one who waters work together with the same purpose. And both will be rewarded for their own hard work.” 1 Corinthians 3:6-8 (NLT)
Do you have a story of letting your life speak louder than your words? Has someone else’s life spoken to you? Share it with us by leaving a comment below. You never know who you might encourage!
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If you know anyone that could benefit from this, please pay it forward! Share this post via the sharing links below. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV)
- Renner, Rick. “Your Life Is Your Pulpit!” Rick Renner Ministries, 25 Mar. 2019, renner.org/devotionals/your-life-is-your-pulpit/. ↑
