Category Archives: Success

How To Use the Correct GPS–God Positioning System

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How To Use the Correct GPS--God Positioning System

How To Use the Correct GPS–God Positioning System

I would consider myself “directionally challenged”.  Just ask my husband.  It doesn’t take much for me to get lost.  I’m a HUGE fan of GPS now though.  Where were personal GPS devices 19 years ago when I was driving to my in-laws’ new house in Texas for the first time?  A GPS would have saved me several wrong turns and a very tearful conversation on the phone with my father-in-law (there might have even been some frantic yelling on my part 🙂 ) as he was trying to verbally direct me to their ranch.  Apparently you can turn both ways on a loop, and if you go the wrong way and then take a right-hand turn you will end up completely opposite of where you want to be.  Oops.

“Directionally challenged” in life

I’ve discovered that sometimes I can be “directionally challenged” in life too, and like a lot of people, I don’t always seek direction and guidance.  Sometimes I even flat-out ignore it.  It’s either…

    • “I don’t need your help. I can do it by myself.”
    • “No way! I’m not doing that!”
    • “That’s got to be the wrong way.”
    • “I think this way might be better.”
    • “I don’t trust you. What if you’re wrong?”
    • or something similar

Next thing I know, I end up lost or completely opposite of where I should be.  What’s even more sad is Continue reading →

Importance of the Right Friends

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Importance of the Right Friends

Importance of the Right Friends

“The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.” (Proverbs 12:26 NIV)

In the previous post we talked about the importance of choosing friends wisely. More specifically, we discussed avoiding unequally yoked friendships. We focused primarily on what it means to be unequally yoked in close relationships. However, we did not spend a lot of time on the reasons why we should avoid these kinds of friendships. Therefore, in this week’s post I’d like to spend more time on the importance of the right friends.

When discussing unequally yoked team animals or draft animals, we mentioned that the mismatch can cause the animals to veer off path or course (even going in circles). The disparity can also lead to burdens on one or both of the animals, a loss of strength and energy, a loss of momentum and forward progression, a slower speed, and basically the animals are working against each other preventing both from completing the tasks set before them.

This is also true when we don’t have relationships with the right friends. Bad friends can endanger our course in life and turn us away from the right direction. They can also cause us undue burdens, deplete our energy and strength (mentally, emotionally, AND spiritually). Not having the right friends can slow us down and hinder our progress in life.

Friends can impact the direction of our life

We must guard our hearts when choosing the right friends. The bible says our hearts determine the course of our life. Therefore, not having the right friends (who affect our heart) can have a tremendous negative impact on the course and direction of our life.

“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Proverbs 4:23 (NLT)

Motivational speaker Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” Similarly, there’s another saying that goes, “Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future.” Both quotes allude to the power that friendships have on our progress in life and in our future.

Our friendships have significant impact on us. There are negative ramifications and consequences when we don’t have the right friends.

Here are a few listed in scripture: Continue reading →

Unequally Yoked Friendships

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Unequally Yoked Friendships

Unequally Yoked Friendships

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14 (ESV)

As a college instructor, a church youth small group leader, and a parent of a teen, I get the opportunity to work with a lot of teens and young adults. A frequent conversation that comes up in each of these roles is that of friendships and choosing friends wisely. Even more specifically, we discuss “unequally yoked friendships” and when/why to engage in them or avoid them.

What does unequally yoked actually mean?

The bible often uses agricultural terms due to the relevance to the culture of that time. People could more easily understand spiritual principles when described with an agricultural analogy because it was relatable to something they already knew and understood.

A “yoke” is a wooden crosspiece, harness, or device that is fastened over the necks of two draft animals (usually oxen) and attached to the plow or cart that they are to pull (see the picture at the top of this post). “Yoke” is also a verb meaning to join, link, or unite something. Therefore, to unequally yoke two animals would be to join or link two animals together that are unequal in size, strength, or capability or to link two different kinds of animals (Deuteronomy 22:10).

If a person were to plow a field with unequally yoked animals, we could probably imagine the problems that could arise…uneven plowing or circular plowing, the smaller/weaker animal can’t keep up, the larger/stronger animal gets slowed down, more burden is put on the larger/stronger animal, etc. The uneven match puts the animals at odds with one another preventing them from being able to work together to perform the task set before them.

What does it mean when applied to our relationships and not team animals?

Therefore, as a relational analogy to be unequally yoked refers to linking, joining, or uniting two people that are not likeminded or differ in morals, values, and/or beliefs. Specifically in 2 Corinthians 6:14 it mentions not to be yoked with unbelievers, in other words, not to be spiritually mismatched.

Does it only apply to dating or marriage?

Continue reading →

Modern Day Idolatry

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Modern Day Idolatry

Modern Day Idolatry

“You must not have any other god but me. You must not make for yourself an idol of any kind or an image of anything in the heavens or on the earth or in the sea.” Exodus 20:3-4 (NLT)

In this day and age many Christians think idolatry is a thing of the past or a thing of Eastern Religion or third-world countries who serve pagan gods. We tend to think of idolatry as a physical statue or item of worship—a physical image of another god…For example when the Israelites made a golden calf to worship at the base of Mount Sinai (Exodus 32). We often don’t even consider that idolatry is alive and thriving even among Christians today, even in our OWN homes and lives.

Idolatry has been defined as “1. worship of idols; and/or 2. excessive devotion to or reverence for some person or thing”. I like the definition of being “excessively devoted to something”. This seems to render more true of modern day idolatry than to think of worshiping an idol or graven image of a god.

Today idolatry takes on new forms. It’s not just golden statues. It could be anything that diverts attention away from serving God or anything that takes precedence over God. Idols could be simply any pleasure in life that we prioritize over God, any “excessive devotion to something” more than God.

It has to do with what we “treasure”, with what is in our hearts.

“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.” Matthew 6:19-21 (NLT)

Things we can idolize or “treasure”…

    • People (our spouses/significant others, our children, our friends)
    • Hobbies
    • Work/Career/Performance
    • Fitness
    • Physical appearance/image
    • Social media
    • Entertainment
    • Music
    • Traveling
    • Food
    • Sex/Lust
    • Money
    • Material possessions/superficial gain
    • Fame
    • Power
    • Passions that we pursue
    • Addictions
    • Sometimes it’s even ourselves: “Me, me, me. It’s all about me and what I want and deserve.”

Obsessions, “gods”, and “churches”

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Are All Sins Equal?

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Are All Sins Equal?

Are All Sins Equal?

A couple of years ago at a church youth service we tackled the question, “Are all sins equal?” This brought up some interesting discussion, and honestly the answers were all across the board. Somehow all of us innately know that there are some grievances that are worse than others. We would be hard-pressed to try to convince someone else that a “little white lie” is just as bad as sexual abuse or murder. Even in the justice system there are levels and degrees of offenses…misdemeanors, felonies, first-degree murder, second-degree murder, etc. Some sins are just more severe, right?

However, is that how God sees it? Does God put more weight on one sin than another? Are all sins equal in God’s eyes? Answering and debating this question can put a lot of Christians at odds with one another, not to mention the conflict this argument can cause with non-Christians. One could take their arguments into opposite ditches. Some would argue that all sins are equal as a way to overlook the severity of certain sins or even as a license to sin. Others would argue that all sins are not equal as an attempt to single out certain groups of people in order to condemn them. Both ditches are wrong.

My goal today is to hopefully provide a little clarification and to give some additional resources to get more wisdom in this area.

Not a quick and easy answer

Unfortunately, I don’t believe this question comes with a quick and easy answer. If it did, here’s how I would respond…

Yes, all sins are equal in that ALL sins separate us from God, regardless of degree of severity. No, all sins are not equal in consequence or in the harm and damage caused to self and/or others. Yes, all sins are equal in that Jesus’ blood and sacrifice is enough to cover them all, each and every one, regardless of degree of severity.

Yes, all sins are equal in that ALL sins separate us from God, regardless of degree of severity. No, all sins are not equal in consequence or in the harm and damage caused to self and/or others.

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I love the way Michael Kruger differentiates between sins… Continue reading →

Are You Flexible When Things Don’t Go As Planned?

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Are You Flexible When Things Don’t Go As Planned?

Are You Flexible When Things Don’t Go As Planned?

I haven’t always been the most flexible person when things haven’t gone as planned. I used to get pretty bent out of shape usually displaying a bit of self-pity, irritation and thus irritability, and even a bit of a negative attitude that often lingers long after the incident has passed. Previously, I would just blame it on my personality. “That’s just how I am,” or “I’m just a very organized, structured person,” or “That’s just my OCD personality” (even though I’m not OCD nor should I be confessing/claiming that over myself).

However, I was pretty convicted after reading something that Joyce Meyer wrote in her book “Battlefield of the Mind: Winning the Battle in Your Mind”. In the chapter on being positive Joyce said, “In Romans 12:16 the Apostle Paul tells us to readily adjust ourselves to people and things. The idea is that we must learn to become the kind of person who plans things but who doesn’t fall apart if that plan doesn’t work out.”[1]

“…readily adjust yourself to people and things…” Romans 12:16 (AMP)

For me, when things didn’t go how I saw them going in my mind, I would typically fall apart. I was not flexible nor did I “readily adjust” myself to my unexpected situations.

After reading what Joyce Meyer said and reading Romans 12:16 in the Amplified translation, I decided that it was time that I start making some changes. Becoming more flexible has been a very hard, but rewarding, lesson that I’ve had to learn over the past several years. I can’t say that I’ve quite mastered it yet, but I’ve definitely made some great strides in this area.

Be flexible–“Readily adjust yourself to people and things…” Romans 12:16 (AMP)

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Practice being flexible this week during my first day of summer class

This week was my first week of a summer college class that I’m teaching. The first day of class was riddled with a fair share of unexpected mishaps. However, can I just tell you how proud I was of myself in hindsight!

I was able to see a significant amount of progress in myself in how I handled the situation today versus how I would have responded 5-10 years ago. I remained surprisingly calm, was quick on my feet when responding to problems that arose, and kept a good attitude the entire time! Well, actually one thing did irritate me a little more than it should have, but I recognized it quickly.

Here are a few of the unexpected things I encountered on my first day of class: Continue reading →

Are You Flowing or Stagnant?

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Are You Flowing or Stagnant?

Are You Flowing or Stagnant?

We’ve had an insane amount of water lately due to all the rain in our area. Unfortunately, heavy rains and debris caused our culvert at the end of our drive to get clogged. Subsequently, this caused water to back up and become stagnant in a ditch/creek bed in our yard. After a while, the stagnant water started to smell and accumulate algae, mosquitos, and even a moderately-sized alligator snapping turtle. We could see that it was going to be a major problem if we didn’t get the water flowing again soon.

Looking back through my old journal entries, I saw a page where I that I had labeled “Flowing not Stagnant” at the top. On the page I had written myself a note of how I should be like a river of living water flowing and not stagnant, stale, or still. I had then listed some of the problems with stagnant water.

Thinking back, I remember that when I wrote that I was kind of in a state of sitting around and not doing much spiritually…not a lot of growth, not a lot forward motion or of stepping out of my current comfort zone. Honestly, I was in a place of sitting still, stewing, and complaining. I was starting to get kind of nasty and gross, a lot like stagnant water. I felt that God was impressing upon me that I needed to get moving and stop sitting spiritually idle.

Flowing not stagnant

Stagnant water, stagnant spirituality, and the effects

Continue reading →

5 Steps to Fight Fear

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5 Steps to Fight Fear

5 Steps to Fight Fear

We just celebrated Mother’s Day here in the U.S. this past weekend. As I’m sure any mother could attest, there are a lot of joys to motherhood, but unfortunately there are some downsides too. As a mother, one of the things I’ve had to learn is how to fight fear. It’s almost laughable the things that could go through a mom’s head and the “what if” scenarios that frequently play out in our imaginations!

Learning to fight fear is not only something that comes in handy as a mother but it is also a skill that proves beneficial in all aspects of life regardless of your role. We all need to learn to fight fear. Today I thought I’d share some of my previous crazy mom fears with you in addition to giving you a few steps and strategies that have helped me to fight fear in hopes of helping you overcome your own fears.

Some of my crazy pre-mom fears

In a previous post, I mentioned that before even having kids I had fears about becoming a mom, to the point I used to swear off ever having kids. I feared that I didn’t have what it took to be a good mom. My nature is not typically very maternal, nurturing, nor very “lovey-dovey”. In my mind I didn’t fit the “good mom mold”. I just knew I would mess the kids up.

I feared what having kids would do to my body. Really, I mean stretch marks, droopy boobs, and the potential of never achieving that pre-baby body again means the end of the world, right?  Then of course the potential pain of childbirth was extremely unnerving and fear-inducing.

Now, after having 2 kiddos I know that those fears were unfounded. Although somewhat true, they were nothing to truly fear.  I was able to fight through and overcome each of them.

Crazy new mom fears I had

Then after having kids you wouldn’t believe the crazy scenarios that would play through my head. For example, I explicitly remember that every time I would go into my mom’s bedroom in her house to nurse, I would sit on her bed and immediately start having these fears of lifting the baby up with both arms only to whack their little, soft baby head on the shelves that are over my mom’s bed. In my imagination, this would of course result in severe head and brain injury…blood…death…all from a bookshelf and nursing. Yep. Told you I was crazy!

Or…In my split level home I have a set of brick stairs that go down into the living room. Walking with the baby, I would imagine myself tripping down the stairs and launching the baby into the air across the room where he/she would of course, you know…die.

Then nearly EVERY SINGLE TIME after I would drop the kids off with my mom or whoever else might be watching them, when I would exit my vehicle to go into a gas station, grocery store, or work I would have a minor panic attack…”Did I leave the kids in the car? Did I FOR SURE drop them off already?”

I had frequent crazy fears that I was somehow going to inadvertently kill my kids…forget them…lose them…or just permanently mess them up in some way, shape, or form.

Crazy current mom fears

Continue reading →