Tag Archives: getting through hard times

Suffering for the Benefit of Others

Suffering for the Benefit of Others

Suffering for the Benefit of Others

Do you ever seem to have “rare” problems or situations frequently happening to you or in your realm of influence? Then, of course you’re going to be the one to stand up and do something about it, take a stand for the right thing, or even advocate for the cause and benefit of others. Do you ever seem to be the one that is constantly having to fight the battles or go through stuff that others seem to be immune to for some reason? Or does it seem like that you are always the one having to point something out?

You can’t help but ask, “Why don’t these things happen to other people? Why am I the only one to witness or notice something which needs attention? How is it that I always have to deal with these types of people? Why do these kinds of problems always happen to me or on my watch? Why am I always the one suffering?”

This seems to happen to me quite often. It just sometimes seems like I’m frequently the one holding my ground, solving the problem, fighting the fight, seeking better communication, pointing out wrongs, and/or advocating for others, and so on.

I find myself sarcastically saying things like…

“Of course it’s my kid…”

“Of course that rare instance happened in my class…”

“I’m not surprised that I’m the only one who didn’t get that or who noticed that…”

Is it just me?

These situations seem very rare and the fact I’m having to deal with “rare” situations quite often feels very isolating. I’m sure I’m not alone in dealing with this, but it feels that way at times (as I’m sure it does for you too). Even though these situations often result in the good and benefit of others, I can’t help but question why these kinds of things are always happening to me.

A good friend of mine frequently tells me it’s because God knows I can handle it. He knows I’m strong, and he knows that I’ll do something about it. I typically respond, “Well, why can’t he pick someone else!?” I even said the other day, “I’m just going to say that I’m not strong enough, and I can’t handle it.” To which she replied something like, “Yeah that’s the thing…you can’t fool God.”

Sometimes I would prefer that somebody else just address things or handle problems. Unfortunately for me it’s not in my nature to turn a blind eye. For some crazy reason, God built in me a problem solving, championing, crusader-like character trait. I will stand and fight for the right thing even when it’s exhausting…even when I feel ill-equipped…even when the end results don’t always go my way. Are you this way too?

Seeing suffering through a different lens

Continue reading

Are You Flexible When Things Don’t Go As Planned?

Are You Flexible When Things Don’t Go As Planned?

Are You Flexible When Things Don’t Go As Planned?

I haven’t always been the most flexible person when things haven’t gone as planned. I used to get pretty bent out of shape usually displaying a bit of self-pity, irritation and thus irritability, and even a bit of a negative attitude that often lingers long after the incident has passed. Previously, I would just blame it on my personality. “That’s just how I am,” or “I’m just a very organized, structured person,” or “That’s just my OCD personality” (even though I’m not OCD nor should I be confessing/claiming that over myself).

However, I was pretty convicted after reading something that Joyce Meyer wrote in her book “Battlefield of the Mind: Winning the Battle in Your Mind”. In the chapter on being positive Joyce said, “In Romans 12:16 the Apostle Paul tells us to readily adjust ourselves to people and things. The idea is that we must learn to become the kind of person who plans things but who doesn’t fall apart if that plan doesn’t work out.”[1]

“…readily adjust yourself to people and things…” Romans 12:16 (AMP)

For me, when things didn’t go how I saw them going in my mind, I would typically fall apart. I was not flexible nor did I “readily adjust” myself to my unexpected situations.

After reading what Joyce Meyer said and reading Romans 12:16 in the Amplified translation, I decided that it was time that I start making some changes. Becoming more flexible has been a very hard, but rewarding, lesson that I’ve had to learn over the past several years. I can’t say that I’ve quite mastered it yet, but I’ve definitely made some great strides in this area.

Practice being flexible this week during my first day of summer class

This week was my first week of a summer college class that I’m teaching. The first day of class was riddled with a fair share of unexpected mishaps. However, can I just tell you how proud I was of myself in hindsight!

I was able to see a significant amount of progress in myself in how I handled the situation today versus how I would have responded 5-10 years ago. I remained surprisingly calm, was quick on my feet when responding to problems that arose, and kept a good attitude the entire time! Well, actually one thing did irritate me a little more than it should have, but I recognized it quickly.

Here are a few of the unexpected things I encountered on my first day of class: Continue reading

Biblical Examples of Waiting

Biblical Examples of Waiting

Biblical Examples of Waiting

“All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.” 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NLT)

I love that we can look to the Bible to learn from others but also to gain encouragement. We can see from many of the Bible stories how the characters, these REAL people, were often extremely relatable and went through many of the same types of things that we endure today—maybe not identical circumstances but comparable troubles and accompanying emotions. We can see that we’re in good company. Because ALL scripture is useful for teaching us, including Bible character stories even as adults, I often use “character studies” in my lessons when teaching where we’ll explore different Bible characters that complement our current topic of study.

Today’s post comes directly from a character study worksheet I use on waiting. There are several examples in the Bible of people who had to practice waiting for various things. We’ll discuss of few of them here. I’ll also vary slightly from my typical post format and implement some “practical steps” with some questions to ponder for each character study instead of waiting to include them at the end.

Unfortunately life requires a lot of waiting

Unfortunately throughout our lives, and often on a number of occasions, we will find ourselves waiting. It’s just one of those unenjoyable life truths. A few things we could find ourselves waiting on might include (but are not limited to):

    • Healing
    • A marriage or relationship to be restored
    • Our future spouse
    • Child(ren)
    • Answers, direction, guidance, and/or purpose
    • A loved one to come to or return to God
    • Financial breakthrough
    • Promotion
    • Freedom
    • Justice
    • Change
    • Fulfillment of a dream
    • Fulfillment of a promise

Waiting can be an extremely difficult and sometimes painful process. Previously I wrote a few posts on this topic that you might also find helpful…

When You’re Waiting on God—to give some ways to wait and some encouragement throughout the process

Explanations for Why We Wait on God—to share some potential reasons behind the waiting

Scriptures for Waiting on God— to give some scriptures to focus on during the waiting periods

To supplement these posts, today’s character studies will give some additional encouragement and hopefully some relatable stories from the Bible to help and give some food for thought in the process of waiting.

Abraham was waiting for a son

Continue reading

Comfort: Together-Strength

Comfort: Together-Strength

Recently, I’ve come to learn that comfort is a word where its meaning has evolved over the years. Its original meaning might not necessarily correlate to how we often use and view it today. Not that our current use of the word is incorrect…but maybe it has an even deeper meaning.

I stumbled across this perspective of the word comfort in a reading plan that I started in my YouVersion Bible app last week. I started a plan called “When God Doesn’t Make Sense”. I’ve been a Christian long enough to know that we can’t always explain things that happen, even though inside our innermost being we just can’t help but to wonder WHY at times.

A “why” moment

I was in one of those “why” modes last week. These moments for me are typically short-lived because I know I’m not guaranteed an answer on this side of heaven. However, I still find myself indulging in them from time to time…hence why I looked up and started the reading plan about God not making sense.

A little over a week ago, we had a very difficult death in our family. My cousin’s wife passed away after a very long health battle. She was very young, only in her 30’s, and the mother of 2 small children. Honestly, I didn’t know her well at all, but I know enough from other family members to know that she was a godly woman. The family has been believing for her healing and recovery for quite some time now.

Her family recently uprooted their lives and relocated to Minnesota to be near the Mayo Clinic where she was being treated. She had been awaiting a liver transplant. After numerous false alarms, they finally found a match. Unfortunately, on the day of her surgery—the day that everyone had been waiting and praying for…the day that was supposed to be a happy day—she passed away. That’s not how it was supposed to go. That’s not the ending we had all been praying for.

How could there possibly be any comfort?

Continue reading

Explanations for Why We Wait on God

Explanations for Why We Wait on God

“This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.Habakkuk 2:3 (NLT)

The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9 (NIV)

I’ve been talking with a couple of friends recently about the draining process of having to wait on God. I’ve written before on this topic and of how it can sometimes seem like God has forgotten us or abandoned us as we’re in this waiting limbo. In that post I gave some encouragement and discussed some strategies to endure the process while we wait on God. I also shared a post with some helpful scriptures for waiting on God.

Today, I thought I’d tackle the subject from a different angle. Sometimes it can be helpful to know WHY we’re having to wait. To give some possible explanations for that, I’m going to share an analogy that I heard many years ago that has helped me tremendously. I’ve re-listened to this message many times since, and I also use it as part of my teaching lessons at Glory House. Additionally, I often refer this same message to friends…in fact I referred it again just this past week!

I love coming up with analogies to teach concepts and principles…but unfortunately I can’t take ANY credit for this one. It’s from a message that Pastor Steven Furtick did on May 5, 2012 at Elevation Church titled, “Waiting Room: Hubs & Spokes, Holding Patterns & the Supernatural Dateline”.[1] (You can watch the message here.) It’s such a good illustration that explains the process of waiting so much more clearly. The analogy compares our wait on God to some things you might experience when flying.

I’m going to summarize his main points, adding in some examples and expounding a bit so that I’m not repeating his exact message because I’d really like you to go have a listen for yourself!

Hubs and Spokes—We don’t always get a direct flight

Continue reading

Keep Your Eyes and Focus on Jesus

Keep Your Eyes and Focus on Jesus

Keep Your Eyes and Focus on Jesus

It’s easy to lose spiritual focus and get distracted when things don’t seem to be going our way. It’s especially true when we see or experience injustices, trouble, unethical behavior or wrongdoing. However, the Bible encourages us that even, and especially in those times, we should keep our focus and our eyes fixed on Jesus.

God has been showing me some of that lately. I tend to get more frustrated and discouraged when I rely on myself and my own strength instead of remembering that I have a God that will give me the strength I need to handle and endure anything that comes my way if I’ll just look to him.

Sometimes things just get under our skin so much that we forget about God’s role and ability in the whole process. For example, state budget cuts and administrative changes have completely affected education where I live. I teach at a local community college, and we’ve experienced some significant negative effects as well.

Take this upcoming semester, for instance…

In my department alone, over half of the classes have been canceled, instructors are receiving fewer teaching assignments but still have increased workloads, and a tremendous amount of autonomy has been eliminated. It’s super frustrating for both professors and students alike. I had a class canceled this semester, and a good friend of mine did as well, even though she was guaranteed a certain number of classes in return for some uncompensated work that she did.

In these situations it’s extremely easy to focus on the injustice. It’s easy to spend time stewing and trying to think of ways that we can make things right, change our circumstances, and/or make people see the error of their ways. What I should be doing instead is just focusing on God and the things that are in my control. I have to choose to shift my focus from the negative to God. 

Park’s tree

Continue reading

Scriptures for Waiting on God

Scriptures for Waiting on God

Scriptures for Waiting on God

Last week we were talking about the patience and endurance needed when waiting on God. One of the things we discussed was the importance of encouraging ourselves with God’s promises. I mentioned that we need to find some scriptures to focus on during the waiting periods. So today I thought I’d share a few helpful scriptures for waiting on God.

Scriptures for Waiting on God

“I wait for your salvation, O LORD.” Genesis 49:18 (ESV)

“I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” Psalms 27:13-14 (NIV)

“Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the LORD!” Psalm 31:24 (ESV)

“We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield.” Psalm 33:20 (NIV)

“Be still in the presence of the LORD, and wait patiently for him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.” Psalm 37:7 (NLT)

“LORD, I wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God.” Psalm 38:15 (NIV)

“I have waited with hope for you to save me, O LORD. I have carried out your commandments.” Psalm 119:166 (GW)

“I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.” Psalm 130:5 (NIV)

“Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will avenge you.” Proverbs 20:22 (NIV)

“So the LORD must wait for you to come to him so he can show you his love and compassion. For the LORD is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for his help.” Isaiah 30:18 (NLT)
“But they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31 (ESV)

“For since the world began, no ear has heard and no eye has seen a God like you, who works for those who wait for him!” Isaiah 64:4 (NLT)

“The LORD is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.” Lamentations 3:25-26 (ESV)

“Even though the fig trees have no blossoms, and there are no grapes on the vines; even though the olive crop fails, and the fields lie empty and barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the LORD! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!” Habakkuk 3:17-18 (NLT) Continue reading

Be a Light in the Darkness

Be a Light in the Darkness

Be a Light in the Darkness

“You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.” Matthew 5:14-16 (NLT)

It seems like lately there has been so much awful, negative stuff going on all around us. There have been numerous devastating hurricanes and storms one right after another. Tragedies, attacks, murders and threats are happening both on grand scales and at individual levels affecting families all over the world. Suicide is wreaking havoc on the families and friends of its victims. Racial tensions are causing division. I could go on, but I think you get the picture. A lot stuff going on in the world lately just really kind of sucks to be honest! It’s dark. It’s broken.

Be a light in the darkness...The darkest nights produce the brightest stars.

The darkest nights produce the brightest stars.

On a side note…I have a friend that’s endured a lot of dark and tough times throughout the course of her life. No matter what she has gone through or continues to go through, she continues to stay positive even during some of the toughest times. She consistently remains a light in the darkness and a beacon of hope. This year for her birthday I got her a bracelet that reminded me so much of her that said, “The darkest nights produce the brightest stars.” More Christians need to follow her example to be a light in the darkness. 

Just this past weekend my pastor did a message on “What Difference Does God Make…In the Face of Evil?” One of our pastors pointed out that in dark times it’s an opportunity for Christians to shine even brighter. One of my devotions this week also emphasized the importance of sharing hope and bearing witness of Jesus. It’s kind of been a theme that I’ve seen repeated lately—that we need to be a light.

Now, how can we practically do that?

Practical wisdom on how to be a light in scripture

Continue reading