Tag Archives: love one another

“Make Me Feel Important”

Make Me Feel Important

Imagine that everyone that you meet is wearing a sign that says, “Make Me Feel Important”

In a recent post, we discussed how we are often more important than we realize. So today, I thought I’d flip the script a bit and repost an older article about how we need to make others feel important by imagining that everyone wears a sign that says, “Make me feel important.”

My church is a pretty large church in Tulsa, OK.  There are several things that our church does to make a big church feel a little smaller with small groups, serving opportunities, outreaches, etc.  One of the things we used to do was called a “section community” which is defined as people who connect weekly by sitting in the same section of the auditorium when they come to church.  Each section has section leaders who facilitate connection among the section members.

My section had some pretty great leaders—Scott and Dawn.  One way they connected with us on a regular basis outside of service was through some encouraging e-mails and Facebook posts.  One time they sent an e-mail that I TOTALLY loved, and I got their permission to share it on my blog.  It’s about how we, as Christians, should be treating others.  In particular, they shared how we should imagine that everyone that we encounter on a day-to-day basis is wearing a sign that says, “Make me feel important”.

Here is Scott and Dawn’s e-mail message:

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Be Kind: Put On Your Kindness Hat!

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Be Kind: Put On Your Kindness Hat!

We live in such a polarized world these days. Even people within their own “in-group” are at odds in many cases, Christians NOT being exempt from this. Strife abounds, and we don’t have to look far to find turmoil, political and social unrest, religious animosity, rudeness, incivility, and unkindness. The t-shirt and bumper sticker saying rings true: Mean people suck. God calls us to be different though. He calls us to a higher standard–to be kind, even when it’s undeserved. It’s high time we all put on our kindness hats!

Last week I created a resource page with scriptures about kindness and the kindness of God. Those scriptures will serve as a foundation for this post where we’ll discuss some of the characteristics of kindness and what being kind might look like in action, in addition to WHY we should be kind and HOW to be kind, especially when it’s not easy or might not come naturally.

Characteristics of kindness

In many New Testament scriptures about kindness or instructions to be kind, the original Greek language defines some of the characteristics of kindness that are relayed.

Some of the Greek words (stemming from the same root) include “chrestos”, “chrestotes”, and “chresteuomai”. The meanings and characteristics include things like…

    • Kindness, to be kind
    • Gentleness, to be gentle
    • Goodness, to be good
    • Graciousness, to be gracious or offer grace
    • to be considerate and thoughtful of others
    • to show oneself useful (in manner and morals)
    • excellence (in character or demeanor)
    • to act benevolently
    • to be friendly

In some scriptures, and in the original language, the word “kindness” is paired or interchanged with “gentle spirit” (“epiekes” in Greek). This carries the meaning of things like…

    • Gentle
    • Moderation
    • Patient
    • Mild
    • Appropriate (fair, equitable, reasonable)
    • to be considerate
    • to be kind
    • Reasonableness
    • Unselfishness
    • Forbearing Spirit
    • Graciousness
    • Mercy
    • Tolerance

Some verses in different translations can relay and expand in these characteristics and meanings:

“Be kind and helpful to one another, tender-hearted [compassionate, understanding], forgiving one another [readily and freely], just as God in Christ also forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 (AMP)

“And become useful and helpful and kind to one another, tenderhearted (compassionate, understanding, loving-hearted), forgiving one another [readily and freely], as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 (AMPC)

“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” Galatians 5:22-23 (NLT) *See the similar characteristics that go hand in hand with kindness

“Your kindness should be known to all!” Philippians 4:5 (NAB)

“Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.” Philippians 4:5 (NLT)

“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” Philippians 4:5 (NIV)

God turns people around with kindness…We need to take a cue

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Scriptures About Kindness

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Scriptures About Kindness

I’ve written previously about kindness and unity. Scriptures abound about how we should display kindness as a quality and character trait of being a Christian and follower of Jesus. There are also numerous scriptures about how God is kind. (Hence, if we are children of God, we should follow suit.) In this post, I thought I’d create a resource page by compiling a list of scriptures about kindness and how we are called to be kind. In addition, I’ve included a list of scriptures about the kindness of God.

Next week’s post will contain some practical application to these scriptures. We’ll discuss characteristics of kindness and what it might look like in action, WHY we should be kind, and HOW to be kind (especially when it’s not easy or might not come naturally). All of those things will be based upon the foundations of these scriptures in this post.

Scriptures About Kindness

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:31-32 (NLT)

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.” Colossians 3:12-15 (ESV)

“A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult peopleGently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth.” 2 Timothy 2:24-25 (NLT)

Your kindness should be known to all!” Philippians 4:5 (NAB)

“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” Galatians 5:22-23 (NLT)

We prove ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, by the Holy Spirit within us, and by our sincere love.” 2 Corinthians 6:6 (NLT)

“So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 7:12 (NIV)

Do to others as you would like them to do to you.” Luke 6:31 (NLT) Continue reading

Promote Unity

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Promote unity

In last week’s post we talked about God’s desire for unity among his people and his intentions and will for us to be peacemakers. We discussed how that if God desires unity, then we can expect opposition from Satan striving to instigate division and strife. The devil will set up some very tempting traps that can easily and sometimes unknowingly lure us right into division. We previously discussed some ways to evaluate ourselves and our intentions in order to avoid Satan’s traps of engaging in divisive behavior. In this post we’ll address some practical ways to create and promote unity and how to avoid activities or communication that would produce strife or division.

This is by no means an exhaustive or comprehensive list of all of the possible and effective strategies for promoting unity. However, these are a few practical things that we can each start putting into practice right now in our everyday lives as we engage with others. We can all do better to engage in and promote unity with the people we encounter both in person and online.

Unity IS possible…because of Jesus

First we need to realize that the ability to have and promote unity is possible. There can be unity in and because of Jesus Christ. He took two very opposing groups of people and created unity. With Jesus it is possible to remove hostility and bring peace.

“But now you have been united with Christ Jesus. Once you were far away from God, but now you have been brought near to him through the blood of Christ. For Christ himself has brought peace to us. He united Jews and Gentiles into one people when, in his own body on the cross, he broke down the wall of hostility that separated us. He did this by ending the system of law with its commandments and regulations. He made peace between Jews and Gentiles by creating in himself one new people from the two groups. Together as one body, Christ reconciled both groups to God by means of his death on the cross, and our hostility toward each other was put to death.” Ephesians 2:13-16 (NLT)

I loved this quote that I read in one of my Bible reading plans:

“Unity is a keystone element of Jesus’ work on the cross. You have likely experienced the devastatingly divisive power of sin. Sin separates us from God and from each other. But at the cross, Jesus demolished the divisive power of sin. That is why the whole point of Christ’s work was to reconcile that which was pulled apart.

Stories from the book of Acts also show us that God’s work multiplies unity. In so many places throughout Acts, powerful moves of God are associated with believers being of one heart and mind. This unity was not only of a spiritual nature, but also a tangible and visible unity with solutions to real-world problems.

…God is looking for opportunities to multiply unity, because work done in unity among the people of God releases the power of God.”[1]

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A keystone, like unity, holds things together

It mentions that “unity is a keystone element”. A keystone is the central stone at the top of an arch that holds and locks it all together. Keystones reconcile or bring two sides together holding them in a stable position. God did this kind of reconciling on earth through his son, Jesus. Because of what Jesus did we were united back to God and can be united back with people. Operating in unity and peace instead of division, strife, and hostility IS possible!

Love can create and promote unity

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Are You Creating Unity or Division?

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Are You Creating Unity or Division?

The theme of “unity” has come up quite a few times over the past year or more in my readings, journaling, and prayer time. It’s not surprising due to the fact that there has been so much division in the world these days. So many things keep us divided…politics, racial issues, public health issues, gender and sexual identity/orientation issues, theology issues, etc. We truly are a broken world, and only God can mend and unite. He is the source of all unity, and he truly desires unity, not divisiveness.

Unfortunately some of the nastiest and most divisive people are Christians, which I believe saddens God. He wants us to be known by our demonstration of love.

“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:35 (NIV)

I decided to compile my journal notes and scriptures on the matter to write about after experiencing and seeing some divisive interactions myself this past week. This week we’ll look at what God’s heart is on the matter of unity and some ways to measure our hearts and motives against scripture. In the next post, we’ll look at some practical ways to promote unity.

Divisive interactions

I’ve written before that I unfortunately get a lot of hateful emails and comments on my blog, many of them from Christians. I received yet another divisive comment last week (which was not approved/posted since it didn’t adhere to my comment policy). The comment seemed to serve no other purpose than to attempt to cause strife, division, and condemnation. It was definitely not helpful, encouraging, or promoting peace or love in any way to myself or my readers.

Additionally, I saw some other passive-aggressive comments responding to a photo that Beth Moore had posted on Instagram. It was a cute photo that her daughter had taken of her dog crammed in a chair behind Beth while she was trying to read her Bible. Someone had replied with a couple of comments about posting pictures of yourself reading your Bible, indirectly insinuating that maybe these are not genuine and that it puts focus on yourself instead of on God. These comments stirred up quite a storm of conflict, especially amongst Beth Moore’s fans against this commenter. Bam! Division! Strife created; unity gone.

I found myself asking, “Why do people do this? Why do they feel the need to say something…to correct or condemn others…to give their two cents? Do they genuinely think that their comments and interactions are helpful? Do they not see how this fuels a fire of conflict and division? Why do people get sucked in?”

It’s a trap of the devil that so many of us can easily get lured into.

Avoid the trap

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Ways to Fight Discontentment

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Ways to Fight Discontentment

Have you ever struggled with discontentment in something? You know…a situation where you just feel unhappy, frustrated, annoyed, irritated, displeased, dissatisfied, or just flat out angry. It might be in your job, in your marriage, at your current church, in a relationship or friendship, in a class, on a team, or even with material things like your home or your car. I think we all at some point or another in our lives experience some discontentment with various things, myself included.

I have been struggling with a couple of these things myself over the past couple of years. Recently God convicted me about how I was handling some of my frustrations and dissatisfactions. Unfortunately I was letting my discontentment steer some of my attitudes and behaviors, and it wasn’t in a good way. God dealt with me on some practical ways that I can fight discontentment, so that I don’t become bitter or give a foothold to the devil (Ephesians 4:27). This week I thought I’d share some of those strategies with you in hopes that they might help you too if and when you ever struggle with discontentment.

Take Some Practical Steps to Fight Discontentment:

Pray for a right heart and spirit

One of the things that has helped me the most over the past year has been to pray Psalm 51:10 as a heartfelt prayer over myself. By doing this, I’m asking God to change my heart and clean it up and to help me have a right spirit in areas where my heart and spirit may not line up with God and his heart. I’ve seen a tremendous difference in my attitude (and my irritation levels) since doing this. Whenever, I start to feel discontentment and frustration coming on, I will say this verse out loud, sometimes two or three times (or more!).

Another verse that I pray over myself is Ezekiel 36:26 asking God to take away any hard-heartedness or stubbornness that I might have and to help me be more tender and responsive.

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10 (ESV)

“And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.” Ezekiel 36:26 (NLT)

Pray for grace

I’ve also found it extremely helpful to pray for grace. This is the kind of grace to be able to handle things that I normally can’t handle on my own. This definition of grace is God’s ability and enabling power. With God’s ability and power helping us, it makes managing difficult situations much easier and more bearable.

“Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NLT)

“So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.” Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)

Pray for those things that frustrate you

Consider this–maybe God is allowing you to be discontent in certain areas in order to talk to you or trigger you to pray for those areas. Instead of just feeling discontentment in expressing your frustrations and complaining, start praying about those issues or things that you see wrong. Pray about things that need to be changed. Find some scriptures to stand on and believe for that will help with that specific need or problem.

Strive to give, not to get, when you are feeling discontentment

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Acts of Kindness and Good Deeds

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Acts of Kindness and Good Deeds

We have some new little neighbor kids who just moved here from Phoenix a couple months ago. They’ve been coming to the back of the neighborhood where we live and playing in our creek/ditch. Their mom said it’s their favorite place in the whole neighborhood because of the trees and rocks and creek and such. They come catch tadpoles and frogs and crawfish.

I got an idea for act of kindness that my daughter and I could do for these little ones. I can’t take credit for the idea though. It came from my friend Kim. She and her daughter painted some rocks and put them out on walking paths as a surprise for some little girls in their neighborhood to find on their walks. This was such a great idea that my daughter and I decided to duplicate it for our new neighbors.

We painted some rocks in some fun designs and then set them all out in our creek for the kids to find when they come back to play sometime. The anticipation has been so exciting as we’ve been waiting on them to come back to find their surprises. We’ve even talked about expanding our idea to set little decorated rocks out at the base of some of our neighbors mailboxes as an act of kindness for them too so they might have a little fun surprise when they get their mail. Then we discussed even making more to take to some nature trails to lay out for other families and kids to find out some point, and we talked about making some to put in geocaches we find too.

Good deeds rock painting collage

Good deeds painted rocks collage

Expressing an act of kindness is a fun way to pass time

Doing good deeds and seeing the creative ways that others have done good deeds has been a wonderful way to pass the time recently during the COVID-19 pandemic as so many of us are homebound. We love watching clips lately from Some Good News, or following Good News Movement and Global Positive News on Instagram. It’s also fun to get inspiration from those internet or Pinterest posts tagged “faith in humanity restored”. If you’re ever having a bad day these are all good places to focus on the good, pure, lovely and admirable things.

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” Philippians 4:8 (NLT)

However, these are also some great places to get some good ideas for some good deeds! Jesus tells us to love our neighbor. (I’ve even written before about loving your actual neighbor.)

“The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:31 (NIV)

This commandment is only second in importance to loving God with all of our hearts, souls, minds and strength.  I also personally believe that the second command—to love our neighbor—is one way HOW we go about showing our love for God in a tangible, practical way.  We can do this by doing good deeds, loving people, and showing God’s compassion and kindness toward them.  It really does stand out in today’s narcissistic and self-entitled culture where people rarely go out on a limb for another.

They will know we are Christians by our love

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Heap Burning Coals on Their Heads?

Heap Burning Coals on Their Heads?

Heap Burning Coals on Their Heads?

A couple of times over the past week or so I’ve come across the verses that mention the phrase “heap burning coals on his head”.

“If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat, and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink, for you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.” Proverbs 25:21-22 (ESV)

“To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.”” Romans 12:20 (ESV)

At first glance, it sounds a little ironic, like “be nice to be mean”. It almost seems a bit insincere as if we are doing good to our enemy in order to actually punish them in some way. However, through a little bit of further study I found some possible significance to the reference of “heap burning coals”, so I thought I would share my findings with you this week to give you some further understanding and insight as well.

A burning conviction

One possibility is that to heap burning coals on their head might mean to cause a sense of burning conviction. In a way, this will awaken a deadened conscience–think of stoking a fire to bring it back to life again. Being kind to them may cause them to feel shame or remorse for their behavior. An unexpected, undeserved, and merciful response might inspire a guilty conscience and assist in pointing out the error of their ways. At the very least, they should feel their sin more to the point of aggravating them.

Kindness and love bring in light which exposes sin and darkness.

“All who do evil hate the light and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed.” John 3:20 (NLT)

“But their evil intentions will be exposed when the light shines on them” Ephesians 5:13 (NLT)

Melt them into repentance

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