Tag Archives: Self-talk

Weeds in Your Thought Life

Weeds in Your Thought Life

“For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds; Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 (KJV)

Taking thoughts captive is like pulling weeds out of a garden. Our mind is the garden and the bad thoughts would be equivalent to the weeds. Sometimes things grow in our garden that we didn’t plant—weeds, volunteer plants, etc. Some are in direct competition with the good plants there. If they are not removed, they can crowd out, suffocate, leach nutrients, and eventually destroy the garden and become stronger which will then be much more difficult to remove and can cause much more damage.

Much the same, we have thoughts that enter our mind that we didn’t put there. If those thoughts are not removed, they can take over and crowd out positive thinking and eventually destroy a positive mindset and can wreak havoc in our lives and relationships. The negative thoughts, like weeds, will grow stronger and spread and form a stronghold in our mind which is much more difficult to remove and much more damaging than just a passing negative thought. 

Weeds can damage an entire garden, wrong thoughts can damage our soul

In my gardens and flowerbeds, if I allow the weeds to stay, they soak up all of the nutrients, they grow larger and spread out, and they strangle the good plants. This may eventually kill the good plants. If not pulled, the weeds can multiply and take over the garden. I have to get them and keep them under control, and it’s MUCH easier when they’re small—both in size and in number. It’s much more difficult and a lot more work to clean weeds out if I’ve waited until they’ve taken over. It can still be done—it’s just more exhausting and it takes more effort than if I had done it sooner.

Thoughts are much like these weeds. Some thoughts get planted in our minds that aren’t supposed to be there. They’re not supposed to be there because they are in direct conflict with God’s Word. These thoughts may be thoughts of temptation, lust, insecurity, fear, worry, malice, doubt, pride, negative self-talk of any kind, and so on. If these thoughts are not removed, regardless of how small or seemingly insignificant, they could multiply and grow stronger and crowd out the good and godly thoughts in our minds. If these negative thoughts grow in size and in number, they could cause damage—emotionally, mentally, and relationally.

Thoughts lead to action

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How to Make Positive Affirmations Out of Scripture

Learn How to Make Positive Affirmations Out of Scripture...

How to Make Positive Affirmations Out of Scripture

We do positive affirmations at our house on a regular basis.  I’ve shared before (here and here) how they have helped me overcome insecurity.  They help me to sleep better at night.  Daily positive affirmations have also been a part of the morning drive routine for my kids as we headed to school to help them face the day ahead and to build their faith.  The way we make our positive affirmations is by saying what God says about us.  We do this by taking specific scriptures and then just turning them into a statement using words that describe us… “I am…I have…I will…etc.”  Scriptural positive affirmations said aloud are very powerful.  This week I’d like to share with you how to make positive affirmations out of scripture.

WHY we use positive affirmations…

We use and say positive affirmations because they make a difference.  I’ve always been a huge believer in the power of words.  The Bible says that “death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit” in Proverbs 18:21.  I believe there is significant truth in speaking things into existence.  In Romans, the apostle Paul calls it “calling into being what does not yet exist” (Romans 4:17 Berean Study Bible).  Modern science or psychology might consider positive affirmations coming into existence as a self-fulfilling prophecy.  The theory is that a positive (or negative) prophecy or statement, when declared as truth even though it may presently be false, can adequately influence people in order that their responses will eventually fulfill the original statement, prophecy, or positive affirmation.  In other words, our words affect and influence our actions.

Scripturally speaking, I believe this is true because our words also affect our beliefs.  The Bible says that faith comes by hearing (Romans 10:17), particularly when we hear the Word of God.  The more we hear something the more we believe it and the more it sinks down into our hearts, especially when it’s coming from our own mouths.  According to James 3:2-5, our mouths/tongues (and the words that come from them) are to us like the bit is to a horse’s mouth or like the rudder is to a ship.  Even though they are small parts (just like our tongue is a small part), they control, guide, and steer the whole body.  So then can our tongue (our words) guide our body and our lives and change the outcomes thereof.  Therefore, the ability to effectively control our words is a vital life skill. 

Why we use SCRIPTURE in positive affirmations… Continue reading

Overcome Your Failures: They Do NOT Define You!

Overcome your failures: They do NOT define you!

Overcome Your Failures: They Do NOT Define You!

Failures are a common cause of insecurity.  Sometimes these insecurities stem from a fear of failure.  Maybe it’s from previous failures, maybe even a series of them.  Occasionally they may come from failures consisting of bad decisions, wrong living, intentional or even unintentional mistakes, etc.  We occasionally have the misbelief that our failures define us.  They don’t!  Our failures can hinder us and hold us back if we let them, but they don’t have to.  We can learn to overcome them and even use them as a springboard to launch us even further into success.

Failures can teach us.

Failures can teach us.

King David’s sin and failures (adultery and murder) haunted him:  “For I recognize my rebellion; it haunts me day and night.” Psalm 51:3 (NLT)  Our failures often haunt us.  In fact, the devil loves to keep us in this exact position.  Another word for it is self-condemnation.  The devil wants us to believe that we ARE a failure because we have failed.  He loves to keep us in torment over our mistakes.  He wants us to believe that we will never be enough because of what we have done.  The good news is that God says the complete opposite…

“… And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.”” John 8:11 (ESV)

“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” John 3:17 (NIV)

“So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1 (NLT)

God won’t write us off

God won’t write us off. He didn’t write David off, even though he was an adulterer and murderer.

He didn’t write Paul off, even though he was a sworn enemy of Jesus and murderer of Christians.

God won’t write YOU off, regardless of your failures!

God is omniscient (all-knowing).  He already knew Continue reading

Overcome Insecurity From the Inside Out

Overcome Insecurity From the Inside Out

Overcome Insecurity From the Inside Out

Recently I’ve been sharing a lot on how to overcome insecurity in both class settings and youth group. I’ve written on this topic quite a bit in the past. Dealing with insecurity and learning to overcome insecurity has been something that I’ve struggled with for a significant portion of my life, and honestly something that I still struggle with from time to time. I, myself, have to revisit these same strategies and principles as refreshers and reminders.

My goal today is to give some refreshers and also provide some helpful resources (mostly videos and posts) that can be used, saved, and revisited again later (just as I have to do occasionally).

Overcome Insecurity From the Inside Out

I think the most important thing to remember when battling insecurity is that the change must be internal. We have to overcome insecurity from the inside out. The problem lies within our hearts and within our minds and thought life. We cannot fix insecurity that resides inside of us by merely doing things on the outside. True security flows from the inside out.

“It’s not what goes into your body that defiles you; you are defiled by what comes from your heart.” Mark 7:15 (NLT)

The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is? But I, the LORD, search all hearts and examine secret motives. I give all people their due rewards, according to what their actions deserve.” Jeremiah 7:9-10 (NLT)

“Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out…” Psalm 139:13a (MSG)

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” Romans 12:2 (NLT)

“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” Ephesians 4:22-24 (NIV)

Take Some Practical Steps to Overcome Insecurity From The Inside Out:

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Masterpiece throwback

 

Masterpiece throwback

Hello friends!

I apologize for the delay in my post this week. This week I’m actually going to push an easy button, and give you a link to a post I wrote a few years ago. I have several new subscribers, so I thought I’d do a masterpiece throwback to one of my original posts that most of my newer subscribers probably have not seen yet.

This post is called You Are a Masterpiece. Even if you have already read this, we could all use a refresher about how God sees us, right!?

You Are a Masterpiece! Are you insulting your creator?

You Are a Masterpiece!

You Are a Masterpiece! Are you insulting your creator?

Additionally, here’s a video of me speaking on this same topic at a women’s conference in 2015. I spoke there to share about seeing yourself the way God sees you. My goal during this session was to help you learn about insecurities and how to start to overcome them, how to find your identity in Christ, and to give some practical steps to start to improve your self-esteem and self-talk.

P.S.  If you liked this post, you might enjoy receiving new posts delivered right to your inbox each week!  Sign up here

If you know anyone that could benefit from this, please pay it forward!  Share this post via the sharing links below.  “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV)

Stay Healthy—Love Yourself!

Stay Healthy—Love Yourself! Try this exercise to show yourself some love...

Stay Healthy—Love Yourself!

Previously, when I attended a Weight Watchers meeting we talked about ways to love yourself (and NOT the Justin Bieber kind of “Love Yourself”!). We did a fun name acronym activity.  We were supposed to come up with a positive attribute or descriptive word for each letter of our first name. It was funny how so many people had such a hard time with that.  They had a hard time either coming up with words that were positive to describe themselves, or they didn’t want to say them out loud because they felt like they were being arrogant or bragging.  Our leader was trying to encourage them that this is the right time to brag and that it was actually helpful to love yourself.

I wanted to yell out, “Don’t you know that God thinks that of you and sees you that way?!”  Then I realized that I wasn’t reading mine out loud either.  Oops.  It can be hard to love yourself sometimes and then especially to show that you love yourself out loud!  We’ve been trained not to speak highly of ourselves because we may come across as cocky and arrogant.  However, I think there are two ditches.  On the one side is the ditch where we ARE arrogant and speak and think too highly of ourselves.  This is obviously wrong.

“For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.” Romans 12:3 (NIV)

I like how the NLT translation of the verse reads though because it says “…Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us”.  It doesn’t say we can’t say or think good things about ourselves.  It just says we just need to give an honest evaluation by God’s measurement.  We need to see, think, and speak about ourselves based on how God sees us.  And guess what?  He does think we’re pretty great.  Therefore, we need to see ourselves as pretty great too! 

The other ditch is Continue reading

Top 10 Posts of 2014

Happy, Healthy & Prosperous: Top 10 Posts of 2014

The New Year is here!  We had a stellar year in 2014 (of course with ups and downs).  This time last year this blog was just a passing thought in my head.  OK…it was actually a suggestion command from God that I reluctantly accepted over several months (didn’t get my site up and running until July!).  Overall, though I’m so glad I obeyed God.  I feel honored to be used to speak into the lives of people and hopefully share a little bit of insight of practical ways to achieve Godly success in a variety of areas.  This past week I did a year-in-review and checked on my site’s progress.  This week, I thought I’d share the Top 10 Posts of 2014 with you in case you missed any or would like to revisit them.

TOP 10 POSTS OF 2014:

  1. What Does Your Price Tag Say? A Message on Self-Worth…

    What Does Your Price Tag Say? A Message on Self Worth...

    Top 10 Posts of 2014 #1

Our value is not determined by labels that others put on us or by even by labels we put on ourselves.  This post gives some resources and tips on overcoming the negative labels we wear and some tips for creating new ones.

  1. 9 Common Causes of Insecurity

    9 Common Causes of Insecurity

    Top 10 Posts of 2014 #2

Most people deal with insecurity in one form or another.  This post addresses 9 common causes of insecurity with examples of each in scripture.  I share some of my personal struggles with insecurity.

  1. How to Apologize Effectively

    How to Apologize Effectively

    Top 10 Posts of 2014 #3

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How to Feel More Secure About Your Appearance

Appearance photo

How to Feel More Secure About Your Appearance

One of the 9 common causes of insecurity that we previously discussed was feeling insecure due to appearances.  This is an issue for BOTH men and women alike.  It only takes a few commercials or print advertisements to figure this one out.  A majority of them are marketing our appearance—clothing, hair, accessories, makeup, fitness/body image.  I shared how this one was a major issue for me too after my Miss Oklahoma pageant experiences and dealing with some infidelity in many of my relationships growing up.  I always felt like I could never measure up to those “other girls” or to the “ideal body image”—like I would never be as pretty or as fit.

Most of us already know that our appearance is not something that should make us feel insecure, but the reality is that it does.  So how do we overcome this?  Below are some mentalities that will help…

Ways to feel more secure about your appearance:

Know that you’re not alone (the majority of people are conscious about their appearance—dating back thousands of years).  Apparently this is also an issue that crosses the ages.  Image and appearance were important to the “women of old” too.

“Bezalel made the bronze washbasin and its bronze stand from bronze mirrors donated by the women who served at the entrance of the Tabernacle.”  Exodus 38:8 (NLT)

I found this verse interesting because if there were mirrors, then obviously people cared about what they looked like.

“Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.” 1 Peter 3:3-4 (NLT)

If they had to be told NOT to be concerned about outward appearance, then evidently it was an issue.  In a weird way, this was somewhat comforting to me to know that it’s not just a modern problem.  It would seem the devil struck people of all times with issues of insecurity—especially in appearance. Continue reading